Sunday, July 26, 2015

Rainy Days, Fairy Gardens and my boy Hank

We have actually had some sunny days this past week.  The ground needed a couple of days to dry up.  I haven't shown you my fairy gardens this year, because I didn't go all out thinking we would be moving.  I showed you the one in the tool box.  Well, those plants were outgrowing their space, so finally I put them in my rusty wagon. 
This fern is so pretty.  I hope it survives in it's new location.  That impatient plant grew from no where.  Not sure where it came from.  I do have a hanging basket of them.  Not sure.

Still love my stone cottage.  The little girl gnome does too.

I added a some pixie plants and fairy garden items to the flower boxes.  They get so much shade that nothing much does well there.  But they are doing well this year.
This is my boy when I walked in the door.  It may look scary but I was right there.  So close he was licking the camera.  No more blocks guarded the rail.  He can't slip under now, but he could get through like above.
He finally had his first vet visit.  The breeder had given him shots but I don't think she took him to see a vet.  He weighed 6 1/2 pounds.  His parents were 4 and 6 pounds.  We may need a DNA test done.  He plays so hard with Piper.  He runs so fast.  So afraid he will hit his heat on the wall.  He is tough.  He is learning to run and hide under the furniture.  He can get up steps now but jumping down is too scary for him.  You seriously would not believe how hard those two boys play. House training is hit or miss.  Still cleaning up too many accidents.  But he is three months old.  He moves his beds all around the room.  Right now he has it folded in half and sleeping on top bottom side.  I took a picture.  He is a hoot.
Other mother is doing better.  She is on a really strong antibiotic.  Blood counts are off and they still don't know what is going on.  Maybe pneumonia.  She had a chest x-ray on Friday.  My brother came for his pre-scheduled week.  He had to take her somewhere, lab, etc.  So now his week is up.  Heaven forbid he rearrange his life to stay longer.  But get this, he expected me to come as soon as he left and stay indefinitely .  He won't consider a nurse staying with her or worse yet assisted living.  I said I could come for a couple of days but we needed to get someone to help.  He screamed at me and said that my mom should be my one and only priority and then hung up.  I was with her for three weeks before he came home. This happens every time.  And believe me, I think we are up to 13 hospitalizations in 10 years.  I am the one called.  I sit with her during surgeries and help out finding where she goes next.  I run back and forth getting her the things she needs.  Then my brother comes for a week.  And guess what, you guessed it, it's like I never helped out at all.  He thinks since I live 100 miles away and he lives farther, it is all up to me.  So this week my emotions are all over the place.  I did get rest and that's a good thing.  I am so tired of this.  It seems that I am the only one that bends.  He doesn't change any plans.  He is vacationing when she is in the hospital.  My mom continues to do things she knows she shouldn't and therefore getting hurt.  But, it's all okay, because I will bend.  It's expected but not appreciated.    Oh well, I am trying to move on and forget about it.  It's hard even at my age.


Miss Merry said...

Debby, you are a saint. Caring for aging parents is one of the hardest jobs of all. It is worse than caring for a newborn child. They are so needy and usually, so unappreciative. I feel so bad that your brother is acting the way he is. That is so common, too. I was also a "Designated Daughter", the foolish one who still lived in the same state, therefore putting my own life on hold and quitting my job to care for my parents. As EXPECTED by my brothers.

Meanwhile the fairy gardens are just adorable!!! A bright spot in your day!

Hopefully things begin to go more smoothly for you. I think about you often.

Anonymous said...

my gosh, you have so much on your plate, caring for aging parents is such a hard task, I was the one that did it for our parents, my brother is an alcoholic and is of no help, just to criticize,, I think I know how you feel, I always hate to say that to some one because I don't think we really DO know the situation for others but that said, your fairy houses, your gardens, your new puppy, are all things that will help to get you through this, you need YOU time, and it looks like you are the only one that will look out for you,, what would they ever do without you,, take care sweet lady, you have a lot on your plate,,

Sue said...

Can I have your brother's phone number so I can call and tell him where to get off? What a piece of work he is! Hang in there, toots. Let's plan a visit soon. You need some comic relief. :-) On my end here- we have a new roof and the decking and patio repairs start tomorrow. Hope it doesn't rain. xo

Kimberly said...

Sorry about your brother. Hang in there, friend. I love Hank - I can see he is bringing you joy. He is a cutie!

Julia said...

Dear Debby, I know this situation is not getting any better and men are not always the best one to nurture and care for others. Women are usually more caring and nurturing. The fact that your mom is critical of you doesn't make it any easier on your emotions and having your brother yelling at you doesn't help either.

It's a good thing that you can vent here on your blog.

You might look up EFT techniques on the web.... EFT stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques. One of the best teacher of EFT I know is Nick Ortner. His book is called The Tapping Solution. His sister Jessica is also a good EFT teacher and she has a book out also that deals with loosing weight successfully while using Tapping.

If you haven't heard of Tapping it's simply tapping on some pressure points that short circuit what makes you react emotionally. I highly recommend that you look it up and view some youtube videos on the subject. I use the technique quite often when something is really upsetting me and it helps tremendously. Nick and Jessica are both on Facebook.

Your fairy gardens are looking lovely and is one little way to get your stress level down. There may be some EFT practitioners in your area and I would highly recommend that you seek help for your own emotional health as emotional upsets affect your physical health.

I hope that you will have a better week . Hank is adorable.

Musings from Kim K. said...

Your fairy gardens are magical. I'm glad you are finding time to play despite all the caregiving you are doing for your mother and a new puppy! Thinking of you!! Please take care of yourself too!

Mereknits said...

Isn't that just the way of things. I took care of my parents and when my Dad was hospitalized and developed a bad infection I called my MIA sister to tell her things were not good and she was so rude to me I actually hung up the phone on her. She had not seen my parents for years at that point and she was second guessing me! Now it has been 15 years since she has seen them and to my Dad she is a Saint because she calls.

It is ridiculous but happens to all of us. Do what you can and first and foremost take care of yourself.


Edna B said...

Debby, your fairy gardens are just lovely. And I think Hank is adorable. I don't understand though why you would need a DNA test. As for how your brother is behaving toward caring for your parents, I think he's being extremely selfish and horrid.

Taking care of elderly parents is a difficult job, and definitely raises our stress level. However, sometimes we need to think back to when we were babies and toddlers, and how much of our parent's livea were disrupted by having to take care of us. They lost a lot of sleep, and gave us their all 24 hours a day, every day until we were able to help take care of ourselves. This was not easy, as we all know from raising children ourselves.

Why not call the elder care in your mom's community or your mom's insurance to see what kind of in-home care she is eligible for. Someone at her church or local senior center might also know of some help that is available for your mom.

Does Mom have a hobby that she enjoys? Or a way to get out once in a while for a little change of scenery? If she does, it can go a long way to helping her to have a good attitude. Maybe elder care can help with this?

Whatever you do, do take time to care for yourself. This is very important for your own health. Whenever you feel a bit stressful, hug your doggies. This is very good for your health and well being.

My girls are hovering (sort of) over me and my health. I hope to stay in my own home as long as possible, and I hope not to be too difficult to those who will be helping me later on.

My little Pogo is a bit upset with me. I had the audacity to give him doggie food for his breakfast this morning. That's two days in a row! Oh well.

I wish for you a peaceful sunny day. Hugs, Edna B.

Rue said...

I'm so sorry you're going through all that, Debby. I will pray things get better for you.

Hank is adorable though and I'm glad he's there to cheer you up :)


Winkel's Crazy Ideas said...

According to my sister I am always wrong too, nomatter what good things I do, none of it counts. Sad and hard to handle. Love your little fairy gardens so much, what an awsome little caravan!! Blessings, from Pam in Norway xx

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

Sweet friend, I know it may not seem like it, but your patience and loyalty are not going unnoticed. What you give will come back to you..
I think most of us go through this parent thing. I lived far from my Mother but my sister lived close and much fell on her. I've thought about that. Working full time and living far made it difficult for me to do my share and my brother lived close but ..not sure what his story was.
Every family goes through these times. At least most. It was pass of course, but in the meantime..I know it's hard.

Hank is adorable! I can tell he gives you lots of pleasure and smiles.